Does the Divine Forgive?
There's been quite a few posts in my feed reader written along the theme on the Divine's relationship with humanity focusing specifically on forgiveness. Sola Ratione has written a guest post at Unreasonable Faith explaining God's lack of forgiveness as he takes out his anger issues towards mankind's sinfulness on well, himself. Don at Reflections questions if Jesus' death was necessary and concludes that because of our injustices his death was a human inevitability not a divine necessity. Sam at The Scientific Universalist (whom I highly recommend reading) reflects on her experience wrestling with faith and doubt through a difficult period in her life. Andrew Hackman at Hackman's Musings has also recently written a gem I somehow overlooked (I'm trying to catch up on my blog feeds) on the topic of hell as a form of control and self vindication.
Throughout all of these I've found that we as a species have a lot of trouble of simply letting go. Of course this isn't news but I wonder why we continue to hold onto previous transgressions others (including God, the universe, fate, etc) have committed against us? What do we gain by holding back our forgiveness from ourselves and others? It's easy, too easy, to always play the part of the victim while receiving self satisfaction through the knowledge that we've been wronged. In my personal experience forgiveness brings about a wave of relief for all parties involved, but this process also makes us vulnerable. Forgiveness opens that part of ourselves up which we instinctively feel we must guard by all means necessary. It allows us to move on past the harmful event and rebuild the relationships which mean the most to us. This is done not by being constantly reminded of our mistakes (i.e. the imagery of the crucified Christ) through guilt but by forgiving and forgetting. Forgetting entails letting go of past transgressions while still learning from our mistakes. Forgiveness comes from our shared humanity and experiences. We all wrestle with our brokenness and to hold our brothers and sisters to an unreachable level of perfection lacks of compassion.
New Year. Final Post.
10 years ago
7 comments:
Hey Sam, I notice you frequently use the word "brokenness" to describe the human condition. Would you explain that?
You ask some excellent questions. One of the goals I have set myself over the past several years is forgiving the people who have severely hurt me in the past. While at times it was extraordinarily difficult, I have made some progress at becoming more forgiving towards others. I always try and put myself in that person's shoes. If a stranger does something hurtful to me, I always think, maybe they just lost their job, or someone they loved passed away, or they aren't sure how they are going to buy food for their children this month. I am sure I have done thoughtless or cruel things to others when I am upset or worried.
However, forgiving myself for things I have done or things done to me which I blame myself for (even though this latter blame is usually irrational) has been almost impossible. I am a perfectionist and am often criticized for being "too hard" on myself. I believe this is a direct result of being raised in a fundamentalist Christian church. Considerable emphasis was placed on self-accountability and confession of one's sins. In Sunday school, we were taught that God would not forgive our transgressions unless we confessed to Him and repented. I was always terrified of either not realizing I had done something wrong or forgetting something I had done wrong, because then God would not forgive me and I would go to Hell. Even with this constant, detailed confession, I still felt like a bad person. I was all but certain God hated me and actually wanted to send me to Hell. That fear and the guilt it feeds still haunts me today. I have made some progress in the past year and a half, mostly on guilt I have for things done to me which were not in any way my fault. But it is an uphill battle.
Eruesso, I was looking at your profile and I noticed you said you graduated from MTSU. Is that by any chance Middle Tennessee State University? Because that is the school my boyfriend currently attends. This is his third year. It never ceases to amaze me how small the world is!
@Doug
Sorry for the late response. I use the word brokenness to not only describe our lack of perfection (our incompleteness) but the struggle in dealing with our incompleteness.(There was an incredible sermon by Rabbi Rami I linked here which explains my use of the word brokenness but, ironically, the link is broken.) I use incompleteness and brokenness in describing the part of ourselves that yearns to grow, develop and discover. This is why I find a "perfect" God of no use to mankind because there is no room for growth, and because how can a perfect being relate to the imperfect man. I also use it to describe our wrestlings with our nature in the sense that a part of who we are actually bothers us (well at least some of us)! As long as we are uncomfortable with certain traits of our humanity and we will always (I hope) strive to overcome them (hopefully with reason) and grow mentally, culturally, and spiritually.
~Sam~
@Sammy
I'm all about asking questions, especially if I never find out the answer. On the topic of forgiveness one book I've found incredibly helpful and insightful is Rabbi Kushner's How Good Do We Have to Be?. I haven't finished the book yet but I highly recommend it.
I did graduate from Middle TN in May with a degree in Audio Engineering. I minored in Religious Studies and would love to get a degree in religious studies. If you ever get a chance to hear Rabbi Rami Shapiro speak I HIGHLY recommend it. He teaches Religious Studies at MTSU.
Not trying to be contentious or anything, but I'm wondering if "brokenness" is the best word to use to express what you are trying to express.
To my mind it seems to be suggesting that once we were whole (or unbroken) and something happened along the way to change that. And that somehow we might be able to put it all back together the way Humpty Dumpty never did.
The spiritual quest to overcome that "part of who we are [that] actually bothers us" is something I am with you on. But I think of myself as being imperfect, as having been imperfect from the get-go, and just seeking to be the best person I can be. I'm not broken, just imperfect. Maybe we can improve on our imperfection. But what is perfection? Does it actually exist?
I'm starting to make my own head hurt. I believe in goals. I just like to set realistic, achievable goals. It's enough for me to set out to be the best Doug I can be. That's a full-time, lifelong job.
@Doug
I see what you mean. Although I don't believe we were somehow whole at one point (e.g. Garden of Eden) nor that we can be made whole at some future point. It is that lack of wholeness (perfection, completeness, etc.) that makes us so wonderfully human! It is our lack of perfection (or at least what we, as imperfect creatures, call perfection), being the best Doug or Sam that we can be, that I find enthralling. I use the word brokenness more to describe our experience (the ups and downs of life) than our nature.
What is perfection? Meh, I have no clue, nor do I care. What drives me is our insatiable curious motors that drive us to be the best Doug and Sam that we can be.
~Sam~
Actually, I read Rabbi Kushner's How Good Do We Have to Be? a few months ago. I quite enjoyed it. I also read Kushner's Why Bad Things Happen to Good People. Another excellent book. Rabbi Kushner is wonderful at explaining complicated theological concepts. Moreover, I think he truly understands human nature.
I'll pester my boyfriend to take Rami Shapiro's Religious Studies class next semester if he is teaching it. If he does, I'll sit in on one of the classes when I come to visit.
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